Hate-Watching the Newsroom
I watch this show because I enjoy hating it, which is just an enormously lame thing. But… that’s a thing I do. So, I just need to vent some of that— I’ll put it under a jump thing so my TV-hate-viewing venting doesn’t clutter anybody’s dashboard:
- The last couple weeks have been all about the plucky Newsroom characters being FORCED to cover non-news like the Anthony Weiner story because they want to try to persuade the Republican Party into agreeing to a debate format where each of the candidates gets screamed at by a deranged liberal because that is a thing that would ever happen.
- This week didn’t just equate people who are mean to Aaron Sorkin on the internet to homicidal maniacs, but also featured a stirring diatribe from News Jesus about how the internet is evil compared to encyclopedias. Only a limited few people could own encyclopedias and access the information therein, whereas the internet makes information globally available to people regardless of their economic circumstance, but on the other hand, YOU CAN’T BROWSE, you guys. Also, “she had a facebook page and that’s how the bad people found her!” !!!
- The entire show continues to be predicated on the importance of good cable news, whereas in my world, the average age of a FOX news viewer is about 65— actual fact (“A 2011 study by Credit Suisse, found that 25% of cable/satellite customers plan to cancel their service in the next five years”). A number of valid critiques can be made of people getting their news from the internet, but those critiques have to take into account that every newspaper in the world is online and newspapers have for my entire life been better sources of news than television.
- In the romantic subplots, the Newsroom featured a scene of Macenzkie Sloane or whatever her name is yelling “Jeff Daniels’s character isn’t some overconfident buffoon who always thinks he’s right about everything all the time, like our writer is.” That’s my second favorite “it’s cute that you think people buy this garbage” scene of recent memory, my favorite being when Kim Pine concludes a completely condescending diatribe against religious people with “But *I’m* a Christian.” Oh okay, well, then. I guess you can put any crazy shit in a character’s mouth and just have them say, “Well, I’m a Snake-Handler so when I say Snake-Handlers all suck on shit all day, I’m just criticizing my own. Bulletproof!” Who does he think he’s fooling with this shit???
- Because Anthony Weiner is a liberal, the speeches are about “who cares that a Congressman lacks the simple judgment not to tweet photos of his crotch at random women and also tried to lie to the American people about being that stupid? Who cares if someone with that little self-control is running the country? Let’s focus on the issues, instead, you guys!” I’m an atheist pinko leftist, and I think part of what I hate about this show is it makes me root for the Republican Party. It’s so transparently one-sided— and Sorkin’s attempts to write both sides of any debate so lacking any ring of truth, that just the inherent human interest in rooting for the underdog has me rooting for the Tea Party to rush into the Newsroom and reenact the final scenes of Wicker Man with Jeff Daniels.
- I can buy a lot of things but ladies preferring Jeff Daniels to Paul Schneider? I’m a straight guy and I’d still take a shot at Paul Schneider. In that way, I too am a Snake-Handler. I don’t know— he’s a handsome guy, whereas Jeff Daniels looks like a beloved pair of luggage. I ain’t buying that shit. Oh wait I forgot— his character is a BLOGGER, you guys. Women can smell that shit on the dude. DAMN YOU, INTERNET.
- How is Olivia Munn the best thing on that show?? I thought it’d be Kim Pine. I don’t know— it seems like there’s been some weird reevaluation for her with people. I guess some nerd went crazy hard at her and people liked that she told that nerd to fuck off…? Something like that? I missed whatever happened— I know she basically got famous pandering to gamers and being like, “I like the Trek Wars too” on some video game channel, but I don’t see how that audience being jerk-stupid is her fault. She’s good looking and she’s fun to watch on this. People get famous all kinds of stupid ways. I just want the guy who plays Jim from the Office to get a haircut and stop squinting at people, though— why is he constantly squinting at people? Is it because the internet has ruined his eyes? DAMN YOU, INTERNET!
- I found a blog a couple weeks back of one of the Newsroom’s other “writers”, but it was one of the other writers complaining that the internet had failed to accurately report news about the writer’s layoff at the Newsroom. It was like the hall of mirrors shot at the end of Citizen Kane.
- (Sorkin crediting himself for every episode— that’s not what I understand other showrunners do or how they treat the writers who work for them, but…)
- (Also, that story about the layoff referred to one writer not fired as being Sorkin’s ex-girlfriend— google says that was one of the actresses who was topless for the jello scene in Old School. I thought that was a fun, unexpected thing— I always wonder about those people, the random girls who take off their shirts in comedy movies, so good for her, you know. Of course, I’m just a guy who likes topless girls, and not an aspiring screenwriter— if I was an aspiring anything, I suppose I might’ve taken that all differently. But nope— I just like nudity).
- Every episode is still ending with a music montage— the latest seriously ends with a cover of Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow? Because the characters aren’t sure whether they will still be loved the following day! TOO MUCH SUBTLETY. Was Someone to Watch Over Me too expensive??? Embraceable You?
- Rather than go anywhere interesting, the Kim Pine’s Jerk Boyfriend plot finally found its “Gordon left his shirt at someone else’s apartment.” It took them all season to recycle that Sports Night plotline. That many episodes!
- I continue to get more pleasure hating this show than anything besides, well, Breaking Bad, Children’s Hospital, Eric Andre re-runs, Louie, and that internet show Sex House. So basically, than anything else that I watch.
