Why can’t I have lunch/brunch at a restaurant anymore without them leaving a ginormous bottle of water on my table? When were people demanding that to happen? Is that happening everywhere? I feel like it’s every other place in my neighborhood lately…
I’ve mostly been listening to really shallow, top 40 pop music lately, going through a phase where that’s what I listen to a lot (like, songs with Pharrell singing about how his dick apparently is a metaphor for a motorcycle, or maybe the other way around, not sure, or Lorde singing about her teeth— which is more than one song, I like her fine but dang, she’s really into singing about teeth— she’s not into rap music’s dental practices, though, so that’s …better…?). But all that having been said, man, this Beck album is doing nothing for me. It’s just really boring. I mean, maybe I’m not listening to it under ideal circumstances— it’s pretty late at night. One song has a harmonica in it? I’m not Return-of-Bruno era Bruce Willis— I don’t want to be listening to a harmonica at 1 in the morning. That’s a hobo instrument, and I’m a sophisticated gentleman of means.
I don’t know— I really liked that guy’s other albums— especially that stretch where it was, like, Midnight Vultures, Mutations and Sea Change. I liked Sea Change which was the same kind of thing as this one, but this one didn’t have … whatever caught with me on that one. At least tonight it doesn’t. Maybe I’m not giving it enough time…
I have really lousy taste in music though (see above re: my fondness for motorcycle-dick songs). It’s not really something I feel like I’m really particularly discerning with. I really can’t pretend that I know anything about tunes— I like reading people write about music but my opinions about music usually don’t get much deeper than “i like the part with the hand-claps!” (Hand-claps are pretty sweet though). I mean, it’s not Gangnam style in my apartment all the time, or anything. But i like to think it’s Gangnam style in my heart, when it comes to you. Awwww, Happy Valentines Day, everybody. Anyways, I’m going to get back to enjoying my insomnia now, so…
From politics to the personal, from fashion to food, from the campus to the locker room, the desire to be cool has infected all aspects of our lives. At its most harmless, it is annoying. At its worst, it is deadly, on a massive scale. The Cool are the termites of life, infiltrating every nook and cranny and destroying it from within. The Cool report the news, write the scripts, teach our children, run our government—and each day they pass judgment on those who don’t worship at the altar of their coolness. The cool fawn over terrorists, mock the military, and denigrate employers. They are, in short, awful people.
From what we wear and what we eat, to what we smoke and who we poke, pop culture is crafted and manipulated by the cool and, to Greg Gutfeld, that’s Not Cool.
I draw my comics for homicide detectives, so that is who I imagine reading my comics as I work on them.
You know the type. Watched his mom and sister get gunned down over his dad’s drug debts and swore he’d become a cop. Last time he saw his father was when he had to testify against him, but it looks like he’ll have to pay a visit to the state prison to see if he can shake some information about Big Joe Paglia out of him. He has the highest clearance rate in the precinct but he’s never gonna make captain with that chip on his shoulder and that devil on his back. His marriage went to shit ever since he started hitting the bottle. He wants to stop, but he can’t shake that image of his partner’s body getting torn into by the Antelope Ripper after he tied the both of him up in the governor’s mansion. His new partner seems eager, but he can’t trust her yet - she’s a little green, a “diversity hire”, if you know what I mean. She might be the only friend he’s got, though. He knows what the other detectives think of him. He’s no rat, but when they all skimmed a little off the Rordiguez heroin seizure and he passed on taking anything, they started looking at him funny. Doesn’t help that the chief has been riding him ever since he disobeyed a direct order to lay off the mayor’s son’s drug charge. Doesn’t help that he has his ex-wife calling him ten times a day for alimony. He just ended a twelve hour shift by talking a tweaker out of murdering a baby he was using as a hostage and he wants to relax. He goes to his local, orders a shot a cold one, slams a quarter into the jukebox to play his favourite - Charlie “Bird” Parker. He opens up the newest issue of Lose. It’s the only good, pure thing in his day - the only ray of light in his miserable fucking life.
I never want to give up my love and passion for pizza. However, I would like to be able to go to a restaurant where they didn’t serve pizza and order off the menu, which I can’t really do right now. My fiancée is vegetarian, so it would be nice to be able to go out to nicer restaurants with her. We’re sort of limited as to where we go because of my pizza addiction. But at the same time, I don’t want to give it up. And I don’t want to become a foodie or one of those people that has a fetish around food—other than pizza—because I think that’s a dumb by-product of our narcissist society. They have to have locally grown food from around the corner and all that bullshit. I like processed food. I like preservatives and pizza.
Dan Janssen, a diabetic 38 year old man who claims to have been eating cheese pizzas “exclusively every day of my life for the past 25 years”, usually a 14” pizza because he is a vegetarian who doesn’t like vegetables.
People riding bicycles in black and white. Promotional video for a 2014 Wolfpack Hustle Marathon bicycle race through Los Angeles (which is currently cancelled because of a failure to obtain necessary permits).
The Hardy Boys in the Case of the Purloined Antlers True Detective: So, I’m all caught up and it’s a nice little crime show but I’m just mystified what the internet’s been going crazy speculating about. Or at least, that was my impression going in, that the internet was, like, pretending this show was Lost or the X-Files or something and being, like, “I solved this show using my library card, an old Starr the Slayer comic and a Captain Power decoder ring." What is there to theorize about?
Nice enough show, pleasant watch, solid stuff across the board, some impressive bits, I enjoy gratuitous HBO nudity, Woody Harrelson’s wig was pretty funny, etc., but just very confusing after … like, I kind of avoided watching it for a while because … It was just such a strange phenomena, this show, as someone who hadn’t seen any, watching people react. People have been just Acting the Fool over this show. It’s just been weird being on the outside of something like that. And so having seen it now it’s more like … whatever the merits of what I watched or whatever, it’s just strange like… What the hell was going on this whole time?
The news of a Northern California couple’s discovery of more than 1,400 gold coins hidden on their property has experts, history buffs and regular folks speculating on the treasure’s origin. Though officials said it is unlikely the coins were stolen in a turn-of-the-century theft at the U.S. Mint in San Francisco, some wonder if the cache could be one of many believed buried by the Knights of the Golden Circle.
The secretive, subversive Confederate group is thought to have hidden millions in ill-gotten gold across a dozen states to finance a second Civil War.
I think this was the plot of a Lt. Blueberry comic. KNIGHTS OF THE GOLDEN CIRCLE! ”The Northern California couple had walked the path on their gold country property for years before they spotted the edge of a rusty can peeking out of the moss in February 2013.”
Wikipedia— “According to a few fringe historians, after the Civil War, the [Knights of the Golden Circle] went underground and became a secret society. Furthermore, it has been alleged that the James-Younger Gang was the principal source of funds for a second U.S. Civil War that never occurred.” (James being, like, Jesse James). Fringe historians, hidden gold, famous cowboys, secret societies— how is Nicolas Cage not in this story???
They’re figuring the value of the coins at $10 million dollars.