Twist Street

Sam Westing, Barney Northrup, Sandy McSouthers, Julian R. Eastman, & Me

2 notes

Got curious about that free program Blender— it’s a free 3-d modeling program that the young people like, thanks to it being free I guess.  So I followed along paint by numbers-style on a Blender tutorial and made a CGI teddy bear…?  Blender fun-fact: I didn’t know that CGI programs come with “comb” tools in case you want to comb your CGI teddy bear’s hair…?  That was … that was unexpected.  So.  Did I spend a whole evening as a grown adult man combing a teddy bear’s hair?  I guess, technically.  Yes.  If you want to put it that way.  But… I did it using computers and technology and science, so that’s … better somehow…?

Got curious about that free program Blender— it’s a free 3-d modeling program that the young people like, thanks to it being free I guess.  So I followed along paint by numbers-style on a Blender tutorial and made a CGI teddy bear…?  Blender fun-fact: I didn’t know that CGI programs come with “comb” tools in case you want to comb your CGI teddy bear’s hair…?  That was … that was unexpected.  So.  Did I spend a whole evening as a grown adult man combing a teddy bear’s hair?  I guess, technically.  Yes.  If you want to put it that way.  But… I did it using computers and technology and science, so that’s … better somehow…?

Filed under Doogie Did This Before the Internet.

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Nightcrawler trailer.  LA-based crime movie “set in the underground world of crime reporting in Los Angeles”.

I like when movies are advertised as being “set in the underground world” of just about anything— that’s a pretty neat way to advertise a movie.  This movie is set in the underground world of peanut butter & jelly sandwiches.   Ooooh.  It’s peanut butter & jelly sandwiches, but maybe the people making them are wearing interest kinds of eyeshadow or have fancy leather gloves, or I don’t even know, kiss in weird German ways I don’t even know about…?  Jealous.  I feel like I never got to be in an underground world of anything.  I’m into the underground world of napping on the weekend…?  Not very convincing.On the other hand, what do you even wear to a sexually sinister Underground World of Doing Stuff?  I don’t even know what section of the Gap you have to look through, to find the right kind of chinos for that sort of thing…

Filed under movie trailers.

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I wish the makers of Sex Tape had decided instead to explore a couple that was dealing with the fact that their sex tape leaked, and wrapping their heads around the idea that their friends and family could watch it on the Internet. The film’s star, Cameron Diaz, could probably tell you all about it. Remember when that weird S&M video of 19-year-old Diaz surfaced in 2004? She has done her best to scrub all evidence of the thing from the world, but even as the highest-paid actress in Hollywood she couldn’t keep the photos and videos off the Internet, despite drawn-out legal battles and thousands of “cease and desist” emails. And that was 10 years ago! How can I, in the present, derive any enjoyment from watching that same woman break into a warehouse under the assumption that smashing a server with a baseball bat will solve her problem?
Joe Swanberg (director of Drinking Buddies) from a lengthy review he wrote of Sex Tape…?  (Usually you don’t see working filmmakers review movies, let alone mention celebrity S&M videos, so kind of funny to me from that perspective).

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yourmancantcook:

Caption: Just enjoyed a KILLER #homemade stir-fry thanks to tips from my dad this evening. #freshveggies #stirfry #mymancancook #dinnerisserved
YMCC Notes: You guys see a dead rat in the pan, right? Because I definitely see a dead rat in this pan. I don’t even know what else to say about this. Because there is a dead rat in the pan. 
Conclusion: Your man can cook dead rats.

yourmancantcook:

Caption: Just enjoyed a KILLER #homemade stir-fry thanks to tips from my dad this evening. #freshveggies #stirfry #mymancancook #dinnerisserved

YMCC Notes: You guys see a dead rat in the pan, right? Because I definitely see a dead rat in this pan. I don’t even know what else to say about this. Because there is a dead rat in the pan. 

Conclusion: Your man can cook dead rats.

Filed under Photographs of Food.

8 notes

We’re not yet halfway through The Honourable Woman but it’s clear writer/director/producer Hugo Blick has assembled his political thriller with rare confidence and control. Dense, deliberate, harrowing and opaque, it already feels comparable to the most-admired US dramas of recent years while retaining its own unique UK flavour, possibly due to Blick’s instinct to surprise and subvert.
Oh, there’s a new show by the guy who made The Shadow Line??  Damn, I liked The Shadow Line so, so much— and this one’s a Middle Eastern spy thriller starring Maggie Gyllenhaal…? Oh, and Stephen Rea again (aka motherfucking Gatehouse).  Huh!  Neat— plus, good timing since Kiefer Sutherland is done murdering people on my Monday nights.  Trailer.

(Source: theguardian.com)

Filed under All I Ever Write About on this blog is Television... excitement!

39 notes

I eat soylent for breakfast and lunch Monday through Friday. It’s perfect for that. I eat muggle food for dinner and on the weekends. You can’t beat the convenience, though, for the workday. Particularly since I sit in a cube all day, I sip throughout the day and then use my lunch break to go for a walk. For me, doing dishes, grocery shopping and cooking are terrible. This saves me the trouble of doing that for 2/3 of my meals during the week.
A comment to a review of Soylent, a Kickstarter-backed “nutritional sludge” that describes itself as an “open-sourced nutritional drink” named after a science-fiction movie about cannibalism.  (See also, “The Tech Utopia Nobody Wants: Why the World Nerds Are Creating Will be Awful”).  

Filed under Civilization is Doomed.

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A New York City real estate heir who admitted killing his neighbor a decade ago in Texas is facing a new charge in Houston that accuses him of urinating on candy at a drug store.

In 2001, Durst was arrested as a fugitive and admitted killing his neighbor and dumping the remains in Galveston Bay. He claimed self-defense and was acquitted of homicide charges. Durst’s family runs The Durst Organization, a privately held billion-dollar real estate company that owns several New York skyscrapers.

Courtesy of Fox 13 Tampa Bay.  

Holy shit, this guy’s Wikipedia page is fucking crazy. First of all, his wife has been “disappeared” for the last 18 years.  Also a lady who was his long-time friend who was believed to have knowledge of his wife’s “disappearance” was found murdered “execution-style”— “Durst was questioned in both cases but not charged.”  So, there’s that.

He then moved to Texas in 2000 and “began cross-dressing to divert attention from the disappearance” of his wife.  Then, they started finding body parts of his elderly neighbor in Galveston Bay.  He gets arrested, released on bail, becomes Ameria’s first “Billion-dollar fugitive” until he gets caught at a Wegmans in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania “trying to steal a chicken sandwich and a Band-Aid, even though he had $500 cash in his pocket. A police search of his rented car yielded $37,000 in cash, two guns, marijuana and [his murder victim’s] driver’s license.”  Then, he goes on trial, admits “to using a paring knife, two saws and an axe to dismember" his neighbor’s body, but claims he shot his elderly neighbor in the face in self-defense, and a Texas jury buys it and acquits him!  He gets some minor amount of time because of “destroying evidence” (i.e. dismembering his neighbor’s body), gets parole almost immediately, and then violates parole almost immediately.  His own brother: “He’ll kill again, I have no doubt, the question is who is next?”

Then, he bought a townhouse in Harlem (located next to a mortuary!) and now he publicly urinates on candy.  Because ha ha he’s rich and this is America.

Filed under Here's to Crime

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This is a Fox 13 Tampa Bay blog now.  My heart belongs to Fox 13 Tampa Bay.  I have a lady in my life and her name is Fox 13 Tampa Bay.  I have a love in my life that makes me stronger than anything you can imagine, unless you live in Tampa Bay.

Filed under Tampa Bay America 1 Good Times Tag

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Dozens of people reportedly watched—and a grandmother took video—while a couple had sex on Florida’s Bradenton Beach for nearly 25 minutes. Then, witnesses say, they slept “for hours” before going right back to fucking.

"I’ve lived here since 1978 and I go to the beaches and I’ve never seen anything like this," [the grandmother] told Fox 13 Tampa Bay.

"We thought they were dead, but when they woke up, they cuddled for a while, then started into the same thing they did before."

The most affecting thing about this story to me is “Fox 13 Tampa Bay.”  My god.  Just imagine it.  

Filed under Tampa Bay America 1 Good Times Tag